AFTER A WEEKS LONG GAME OF LIVE ACTION “WHERE’S WALDO”, BBRC PRESIDENT JACKIE MAXWELL HAS BEEN FOUND ALIVE!

 

After extensive searching, Jackie Maxwell, 2025-2026 President of the Bakersfield Breakfast Rotary Club was found, alive, in a cave in the remote Alaskan wilderness.  Jackie was living with an alcoholic grizzly bear and a wolverine named Bucky.  As rescuers were dragging Jackie to salvation, she could be heard screaming “These are my people, now!” 

 

President Jackie faced the BBRC members, with bleary eyes, a wrinkled blouse and a tuft of wolverine fur still in her hair.  She seemed genuinely touched when the meeting opened to a thunderous applause…as the Seven Oaks staff finally wheeled in the coffee pot!

 

President Jackie mused “This is just like falling off a bicycle” as she stepped seamlessly back into her Presidential role.  She thanked our greeters, Anne Galvez and Troy Fringer.  Next up was Willie Gordon with the invocation.  The only problem was, everyone knew that except Willie.  Thankfully, Stephanie Baker was present to step in.  John Guerard was tasked with the flag salute but, unfortunately, John was with Willie.  Teresa Waller filled the void and we were able to proceed to the song.  Carol Smith led us in singing “The Four Way Test” and, I might add, we nailed it!

    

President Jackie thanked those past presidents who held our club together in her absence.  They are Cheryl Scott and David Lauri, who were both presented sweaters, as well as Jeff Haynes, who received a halibut hat which, surprisingly, is exactly-the-same shape as his head.  A more natural fit, I have never seen.

 

Our visiting Rotarian this week was Douglas Carothers, our Assistant Governor.  I’m sure our own Duncan Harris will pay dearly for missing his assignment of introducing Douglas.  Jacqui Alexander took over and handled it nicely.

 

We hosted a few guests this week.  Eric Bautista introduced Brenna Layne, who was Denise Cox’s guest.  Denise is not even a Rotarian and she is bringing in the guests.  Way to set the bar high, Denise.  Jeff Bell introduced his youngest daughter, Emma and Bill Black introduced his sweet wife, Jan.

 

As the birthday recognitions rolled around, everyone waited pensively, to see if the rumors of Bart the Birthday Monkey’s untimely death were true.  We had no birthday celebrations this week, but that fact did not save us.  To the horror of nearly everyone in the room, the biggest apparition of an undead birthday monkey, the world has ever seen appeared right before our terrified eyes!  And, to make matters worse, he can’t sing anymore either!

 

On a brighter note, Robert and Linda Provencio celebrated 41 years of wedded bliss on August 18^th.  Mike Turnipseed will be celebrating 20 years as a BBRC member on August 24^th and Bill Black will have been a BBRC member 19 years on August 23^rd.

 

Jackie stated her theme for this Rotary year is:  Strong Traditions, Bright Horizons.  She finished with the threat:  BART WILL BE BACK!

 

President Jackie recounted her trip which started in Shaun Kelly’s back yard (immediately after winning The Great Bicycle Race), took her to Thermopolis, WY, Yellowstone National Park (to pet the bison), to Billings, MT, to Glacier National Park (where there is a Rotary Peace Pole), to Calgary, British Columbia (just missing the Rotary International Convention by a few minutes), to Dawson’s Creek and finally, to Alaska.  Wow, That’s a lot of miles!  Along the way, Jackie picked up her good friend Vickie and put Tom on a plane to ready the place for her arrival. 

 

While in Alaska, Mark and Teresa Waller came by to visit.  However, Jackie seemed disappointed no one wanted to stay for the annual bear petting party…which leads us back to where she was located by authorities before being brought back to Bako, to reality and to Rotary.

 

Two new BBRC members and one returning member received their blue badges this morning.  Brian Wooster and Michelle Zdybowicz, along with former BBRC member Teresa Waller all traded in their red badges for permanent ones and are now, full-fledged BBRC members!  Congratulations to all!

 

There were several Happy Spots this week.  Will Duerkson was $25.00 happy his son proposed to his girlfriend.  Teresa Waller was $50.00 happy to shed her red badge, followed by Michells Zdybowicz and Brian Wooster at $25.00 each.  Jeff Haynes was $20.00 happy for a trip he took to Billings, MT.  Marlene Heisey was $20.00 happy for a trip to Wisconsin, Char Vega was $20.00 happy to celebrate her company being named a Blue Zone Organization and Jeff Bell now has two kids in college, with scholarships!  He was pleased to offer up another $20.00.  Happy news, indeed.

 

For recognitions, Willie Gordon was fined $10.00 for missing his Invocation duties, but arriving in time to be President Jackie’s first fine of her Rotary year.  Frank Wooldridge was fined $30.00 for the barrage of constant advertising his Facebook Followers have had to withstand.  Plus, there was a small matter of his signature being absent from Michelle Zdybowicz’s signature sheet.

 

President Jackie shared a bit of BBRC history with the newer members, stating that, since 1994, the BBRC members have roofed over 40 houses for Habitat for Humanity, with no one falling off, no deaths and no serious injuries!  Jackie can file that in the “W” column.

 

Jennifer Henry announced the upcoming BBRC social on September 11^th at Woodstone Pizza, Charter Night on February 7^th and an Octoberfest social at President Jackie’s house on Friday, October 24^th. 

 

Marti Sanders announced a potential clean-up project at San Miguel Grove on September 13^th.  Tom Burke will send out an email to stir up some early excitement for our Thousand Flags fundraiser, May 23^rd, 24^th and 25^th 2026.

 

Registration is open for the Rotary District Conference, September 17-19 at the Crown Plaza Hotel in Ventura, CA.

 

Jeff Haynes will try to arrange a tailgate party at BC this year.  Details will be announced.  Mindy Wilmot announced a World Peace Day celebration September 21, from 1-2pm at Mill Creek Park.

 

Sally Selby missed Jackie and Rotary while she was in Hawaii, but she did remember to bring back a Kahula sampler for our president.  Jeff and Donna Schwarzt took a trip to Niagara Falls where they personally calculated the rate of water over the falls at 675,000 gallons per second!  Impressive!  The Schwartz’s were also in Canada and brought back a maple syrup picture for our fearless leader.

 

President Jackie thanked our guests:  Brenna Layne, Douglas Carouthers, Emma Bell and Jan Black.

 

The drawing for $65.32 was won by Marti Sanders.  Can you say, I’m buying drinks?

 

Next week’s speaker will be former BBRC member turned U.S. Congressman, Vince Fong.

 

The bell was rung at 7:45 am, bringing Jackie’s first official meeting to an end with time to spare for fellowship.